Whenever I heard the term “mid-life crisis” as a girl growing up in the 80s, it was always related to middle-aged men who suddenly found the need for drastic change or discovery, most often expressed in choices that weren’t always the most positive: a mistress, a sports car, a totally new look. But what about women? Weren’t they ever allowed to reinvent themselves?
Fast forward to the 2010s where it isn’t unheard of to start over in your 60s or 70s. Or in my case, it’s been my 30s and 40s. Eight years ago, I left my first husband and three kids after drowning in the misery of a life that was all obligations. And it had all started from a young age, growing up in a culture where it was all about doing what was expected of you.
Thankfully, for the past four years, I have been in a state of discovery. I have endless opportunities to try new interests, develop new hobbies, and the freedom to arrange my work schedule around these new and exciting changes. With my personality, I have often discovered a new passion, thrown myself into it, immersed myself in it with wild abandon, and then have found that I lost all interest and went searching again for the next new thing.
It’s taking me decades to find my voice, and this is all a wonderful part of it… but sometimes a conundrum. Why can’t my heart and mind just settle on one thing and stick with it? Until today when I realized exactly what I held in my hands, figuratively, and what every single person holds as well.
I believe each person has at least one key. This is a sort of magical connection to a portal to whatever talent he or she has. It’s like the girl who is a bundle of endless energy who suddenly discovers she can channel it into sports, specifically one main sport like soccer. She had the key in her hand the whole time. She just had to find what it unlocked. For me, it’s always been music. I’m most myself when immersed in music. Add that to a run outdoors on unpaved trails in a beautiful state park, and I’m in heaven.
But what if you’re also like me in the sense that many voices call to you? Right now, I can’t get enough of podcasts and books. At first, it was mostly personal development or nonfiction, but now I’m finding new authors who are masters at a combination of both.
Then you must be the lucky holder of several keys. Instead of that one unique key, you have a whole ring of keys in different sizes and varieties. You never know when you will discover the latest treasure. What if you had discarded the ones that were rusted and unused? Then where would you be?
Just think of it. A whole world, or even dimension, awaits, and the greatest thing is you don’t even have to know which keys you have or what they unlock. Maybe you’re like me, a person who spent her whole life doing what was expecting of her and then began to discover all these keys that had been there all along, even finding new ones and new worlds all the time.
So those doubts? The self-questioning? Release those negative thoughts in whichever way is the most effective. Write them down in a journal. Inhale them and then release them. What is one thing that you would love to do or experience if you just had the courage to or if the situation presented itself despite the current financial or emotional state of your life?
Go for it! Jump into that bottomless lake and discover that it’s not as deep as you thought. Just enough for you to submerge yourself from head to toe. Not only that, but it’s the perfect temperature, refreshingly cool for those scorching summer days or deliciously warm when you’re feeling a chill.
I would love to hear what your keys have unlocked for you, and I guarantee there are many of us who will either be able to relate and agree and confirm they experienced the same. Or better yet… they come to an astonishing realization that it may be exactly what they’ve been needing to hear all along.
Grow into Wings 